Friday, October 23, 2009

Dating Virginia: What are you looking for?

"So, what are you looking for?"

There are many questions that I cannot stand to be asked from potential suitors. "What are you looking for?" is at the top. I guess the biggest problem with this question is there is no easy answer. I understand the answers that people are looking for... you know, casual dating, a long term relationship, a friend, a sex partner, a husband, whatever.

Here's the issue I have: I just don't know. Do I want to get married someday? Sure! But, I'm not exactly looking for a husband right now, ya know? But, if that man happened to come into my life tomorrow, I don't think I would deny myself (or him) the opportunity to make a relationship happen. That being said, anyone that comes out saying "I'm looking for my future wife", I'm going to run in the opposite direction.

I mean, each person that comes into your life ultimately has a purpose, but if you begin by defining each person by a specific "job", then you will only wind up disappointed.

So, the answer. Here's what I'm looking for: I am looking for someone who will love me and respect me exactly as I am. Whether that person is a friend or a lover or a husband. Isn't that the same for us all? To be liked for who you are? Not as you were or for what you could be. Not smarter, or thinner, or with a smaller nose. Not taller, or shorter, with longer hair, and a less crazy family. Someone who bring mutual respect into a relationship (whatever space that relationship falls)

So there's the simple answer to a complicated question. I want to be liked just the way I am. Because, I'm pretty sure I'll always be just a little bit fat.

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