Stuff my boyfriend says..

"What is it you want? Eucalypticks?"

Goin' to Carolina

I took a boy home.

There have been many many thoughts and dreams (some nightmares) about eventually bringing someone new back home with me to meet the family. And, I did it. Originally, my plan was to infiltrate slowly. Have the boy meet the family in small groups, slowly, as to not overwhelm him. If you know my family, you know that while they're incredibly warm and welcoming, they can also be very intimidating.

When I went home for Easter, I hated being away from Craig. I know it sounds stupid and silly, but I got comfortable being with him, talking to him all the time, and having that security of him being there. In fact, before then, I saw him at least once a day and usually wouldn't go more than an hour or two without talking to him. I was experiencing some major withdrawal.

I couldn't stop talking about him. Before, I was keeping information about him pretty quiet, because I didn't want to go on and on about something that wasn't going to last, but I couldn't keep it in any longer. I'm sure my family must have gotten tired of hearing about him so much, but it seemed that there was nothing else I could talk about.

Family, to me, has always been a vital part of my life and it was always very important to me that my significant other understand and embrace that as well. So, when Craig told me that he was interested in meeting my family, I was ecstatic. I certainly wouldn't go to that level until we were both ready, but when we realized that we were ready to share our relationship with our families, it all just seemed so natural.

We booked the tickets and planned a long weekend in Carolina for Memorial Day.

When we booked the tickets, I was nervous. Really nervous. Would they like him? Would they approve? And, more importantly, would he like them? What if was too much for him, what if the family was too much to handle? The weekend had the ability to turn out amazing, or devastating.

Not to mention that my mother was planning the party of the decade, inviting both sides of the families. This was not going to be the slow "meet my family" process I had envisioned. This wasn't even going off the deep-end. This was the ocean.

Though, as the weeks went on, I moved from nervous to excited. I couldn't wait to go back home and show off my new addition. I knew they'd like him, but I still wasn't sure how they would be received by him.

We're different, he and I. While we grew up with very similar family values and ideals and we share a lot of the same goals, our lives as children were very different. Financially, we were on opposite ends of the spectrum. He, just minutes from one of the largest cities in the world, and I, a good 30 minute drive to the nearest mall (not even a good one either!) I have cows just over the fence from my backyard that we use often for bonfire parties and he has shapely manicured lawns with fenced-in pools. I was nervous about showing him where I came from. Sure, I have a little "small town" in me, and he can certainly see that. But, my lifestyle certainly has changed now that I'm living in New York. What would he think of the girl that used to go have a Mountain Dew slushie from Sheetz on Friday nights instead of going to bars and clubs? Would he like the food? Would he understand how I could miss that tiny little town?

More importantly, would he feel differently about me when he realizes I grew up with hand-me-down clothes and sharing a bedroom with my sister? Would he think my “roots” were too Southern? Would he find my family dynamics to be less than desirable? I worried, panicked even, for days. I tried to describe to him how I was feeling, explaining my worries, but he assured me that nothing could change the way he feels about me. Still, my mind wouldn’t quiet.

He was a nervous wreck. I can’t blame him, however, because I was unnaturally nervous when I met his mother and father, sister and brother. Even more so when he added in a few cousins, aunts, uncles, and a grandmother! Fortunately for me, it was a slower process. I can’t imagine what he was feeling sitting on a plane knowing that he’d be meeting 40+ of my family members in 2 days.

The flight in was fine, a bit delayed by about 10-15 minutes, but nothing major. My mom and sister were at the airport in NORMAL clothes (I was seriously thinking they would dress up like hillbillies) and no big flashing signs. Such a relief!

While my impression of the weekend as a whole is one of “it was great!”, I’m still not completely sure what he feels about the whole thing. I assured him that my family is much easier to navigate when they’re in smaller groups (meaning, mom side/dad side) and I’ve assured myself that my family knowing him the way I do will take some time.

Since we don’t live near them, this process will be slow-going and in short, quick segments. I only hope that my family could see how amazing he really is.

So my first time bringing a boy home was not as terrifying as my mind made it out to be. After all, my family only wants to see me happy, and once they see that he is the one that is making it happen, they’ll love him as much as I do.

It is my hope that we can go back again soon, this time: no worries.

VA Reviews: Completely Bare's Brazilian Bikini Wax

Disclaimer: This post is of a very personal nature (might get graphic at times) and if you're not interested in reading about lady parts, move right along, friend.

Brazilian Bikini Wax. The words themselves can cause tingly sensations of the spine and quivering between your legs (not the good kind, either) So, why do so many women decide to have a stranger peel apart their most intimate layers, pour hot wax on them, and rip tiny hairs out of their snuggly warm homes to cause pain? Coming up, I find out.

A shaver, myself, I always wanted to keep things neat and tidy in my nether regions. Not bare. Call me crazy, but I always felt a little jouvenile with no hair "down there". Truth is, I got lazy. Because I was living with MP and his two siblings, sharing a bathroom, I didn't have the time to takeover the bathroom for a long time to do some grooming. So, I started looking into waxing. "Hey," I thought, "in one hour, someone else could take care of all of this for me!" So, I went for it. For the non-waxing-educated, a Brazilian is where ALL of the hair is removed, front to back, with the exception of some hair left on the "top".

I went to the Completely Bare salon on New York's 5th Avenue. While the building itself wasn't the best (a typical, New York entry, dirty floors, slow elevator), the decorum changed as soon as I stepped off the elevator onto the 4th floor. Clean, very open, little furniture, the place seemed like it tried to be a spa but ran out of money. I guess the open "greeting area" is to help create serenity for the guests. I mean, really, you need some serenity... my heart was racing.

I met Christina shortly after filling out some paperwork and she took me back into a small room down a hallway. She was nice, though didn't seem to sense my nervousness, she talked like I was coming in for a manicure.

Finally, she asked:
"Have you ever had anything waxed before?"
"Just eyebrows.."

"Oh, no bikini waxing then?"
"Nope. First time.. you might want to walk me through this."

She laughed, though I'm pretty sure it was just at my candid way of saying it - though after that, she was really great about keeping me informed about what was happening and what I should do.

Here's the thing. It hurt, yes, but it's a sharp, quick pain that fades immediately. It's not the pain that is the problem. It's that it's AWKWARD! There's a lady pulling and tugging on your lady-parts to try to get all of the hair. Not only is she making things uncomfortable, but she then rips it all out! Couple that with some really awkward comments. "I'll start with the labia..." "The inner butt is the easiest." Uhhhhh....?

There was a tv in the ceiling (smart, people!) so I could watch some 1940s movie while I had to endure the uncomfortable waxing. Though, she did say she was shocked at my non-reaction to the whole thing. No screaming, no jerking.. I'm amazing ;)

Overall, the experience wasn't that bad. Sure, it was awkward, uncomfortable, and a little painful, but I haven't had to worry about any sort of grooming for almost 3 weeks now. To me, that's worth it.

Completely Bare is a little more pricey than I would pay on the regular, but if you're needing a first time experience, I'd say they're a good choice. Will I do it again, sure. But, I'll find a cheaper salon next time.

VA Rating: 7

Good service, nice work, but high price and heavy unconfortable nature.

Completely Bare Salon - NYC

How freakin' cool is this?!

How amazing would it be to stay in this hotel?? Imagine laying in bed, staring up at the beautiful underwater scene and snacking on delicious food brought special to your bedside. Whoa, lust!

Middle of the Indian Ocean, Maldives
Luxist says:

The world's first undersea restaurant opened 5 years ago this month at the Conrad Maldives Rangali Island, and to celebrate the anniversary the restaurant is offering guests the chance to not only eat under the sea but sleep under it as well. The 12-seat restaurant will be converted to a private bedroom suite for two, complete with private champagne dinner and breakfast in bed.

Ithaa sits five meters below the surface of the Indian Ocean, encased in plexiglass and reached by descending a spiral staircase. The restaurant offers breathtaking views and 'fusion Maldivian cuisine' (local cooking with a western twist), and rumor has it that over lunch the place is so bright that guests and staff have to wear sunglasses (they even keep spares on hand and offer a sunglasses cleaning service). Sounds wonderful, although I imagine seeing the sun rise while eating breakfast in bed is even better.

Quick updates!

Well, it's finally happened, I'm a full time employee! With benefits, paid vacation, the works! It took a while to get through the "process" of becoming full-time, but I remained patient and everything has worked out. So, it's official. I'm the Sales Coordinator at Solid State Logic :)

In other news, Craig was mad at me this morning because I apparently "slept crazy" last night, leaving him sleepless. Whatever, I had a dream he got me a box fan for my birthday. I woke up mad too. ;)

Stuff my boyfriend says..

Him: "Your butt has gotten bigger."
Me: "What!?!"
Him: "No, in a good way! ... Wait, what? No it hasn't."

Stuff my boyfriend says..

"Look! I got you travel size shampoo AND conditioner! And, it's girly. See? It's orange."

10 Awesome Things My Mother Taught Me

Yesterday was Mother's Day. I hope you all had wonderful times with your mothers and really showed them that you love them. I, unfortunately, could not be with my mother yesterday, but I spent a lot of time this week thinking about what mothers mean to us and how we can properly honor them for everything they have done for us.

I spent Mothers Day with Craig and his family in Long Island. To me, it wasn't so much a celebration of mothers, but a celebration of families. Which, isn't that really what Mother's Day is about, anyway? It was a day full of food, family, and laughter. And though I missed my own family very much, being with his family reminded me that family is universal. Love is universal. I am so grateful to have a "surrogate" family so accepting of me. It actually kind of felt like being home.

My mother is a teacher. It takes a special kind of person to become a teacher and share passions with others. But, even more than a teacher of students, she is a teacher of children; her own children. So, I thought that the best way to honor my mother would be to note her teaching accomplishments - though in a different way. So, here are the top ten amazing things my mother has taught me.

1. How to read
I don’t mean this one to be so literal. Yes, technically, my mother taught me how to read as a child. She read to me every single night before bed and one night, I said, “I’m going to read to you!” “Ha! Okay, go ahead!” she said, thinking I would ramble something about the pictures on the pages. I read each page, carefully holding the giant book in my little hands. My mom was skeptical. “She’s memorized it,” she thought. But as she handed me book after book, I read each one aloud to her. Her passion for books and the time we spent bonding over them before bed started my love of reading. More important than the ability to read, she taught me to value reading and how to read for pleasure. Sure, reading books for school is fine, but she opened a new world for me; one where you could get lost in a book, become friends with fictional characters, and change your life in 500 pages. We would sometimes share a special bond, where one of us would slink down the stairs in the morning, clearly exhausted. “Did you not sleep?” “No, I had to finish that book.” It’s understood.

2. How to create
It’s no secret that my family is one of creators. My grandfather builds beautiful pieces out of wood, my grandmother sews, my father builds, the list goes on and on, but my mother has always been an advocate for creative thinking. From the first time I used a sewing machine to make my very own outfit. My mother patiently watched, carefully helped, while allowing me to experience it all on my own. It was mine. I made it. In my mother’s eyes, anything I could ever want could be made. Because of this, I have a hard time shopping for anything without thinking, “I could make that.” Arts and crafts have always been a soothing experience for me. I studied graphic design in college. The ‘art’ of creating is in my blood.

3. How to work hard
My mother works hard. She really does. She’s a teacher of music and drama at two schools, the choir director at a church, and she’s a full time mother, sister, daughter, and wife. She’s a “leave at 7:00am, come home at 9:00pm” type of woman. And, she wouldn’t have it any other way. If there’s one thing my mother has, it’s a stellar work ethic. It’s inspiring.

4. “Wear lipstick”
Back in middle school, I fought with my mother constantly about her not allowing me to wear makeup. I thought that in order to fit in with the other students in the school, I too needed to wear blue eyeshadow and mascara every day. After granting me permission and purchasing a few things for me, she quickly found that I favored eye makeup over anything else. “Wear lipstick, you look sick without it,” she would warn. It wasn’t until I got to college that I really understood what she was saying. She was telling me that I have a feature that is beautiful and I wasn’t showing it off. She could see that I looked better, healthier, and happier with a shade of pink on my lips.

5. “Family is vital”
My parents never really had an abundance of friends. Sure, they have their social circles and I’ve met many of their close friends, but they never had friends like some other parents I knew. It was because of family. Coming from a large family, you have built-in friends. People who will help you, come to your aid, listen to your problems, offer advice, and sometimes, drive you crazy. There was no problem I could have that couldn’t have been fixed by a family member. And, since birth, my siblings and I were always taught (and shown) the value of a loving family. It is my hope that I one day can have a family of my own that can expand the already beautiful family I have now. And with those children, I will instill the same values that my mother and father taught me. Family is vital.

6. How to be self-sufficient
My mother didn’t “baby” me. Sure, she took care of things I could not handle, but knew me well enough to understand my need for independence and my abilities to take care of it myself. She nurtured me in the way of self-sufficiency. Do you need a shirt washed? Take care of it. Do you need 50 cupcakes for your class tomorrow? I’ll teach you how to bake them. It might sound a little like neglect, but it was nothing like that. She was slowly teaching me how to be an individual, how to take care of myself so I can one day effectively take care of others.

7. “Let it go”
Forgiveness is difficult. Yet, my mother seems to be a master at it. Sure, she can hold a grudge for a little while, but after a short time, she just lets it go. I can admit, begrudgingly, that I do not have the same abilities to forgive and let go as she does. But she shows me that it is possible, and those things you hold onto only prevent you from experiencing the new and good in the world. This is a lesson she is still teaching me.

8. Appreciation of music, theater, and performing arts
My mother is music. She always has been, always will be. It is through her that I have an appreciation for music. One of my oldest memories of my mother’s music was a time she was singing at a wedding. “Morning Has Broken” I can still remember the beautiful song, even though I was probably only 4 years old. As she sang, me sitting in between my brother and father, I can remember the pride I felt. That’s MY mother. She sings, and it’s beautiful. Genetically, I didn’t receive the same singing abilities as my sister and brother, but she still passed to me a divine love of the arts and theater. I danced, I played the flute, I helped in every musical and concert she put on. Not because I had to, but because I wanted to. I know of its importance and I still value the discipline it taught me.

9. Be generous
She is one of the most generous people I know. Even when there isn’t much to give, she gives what she has. She is generous in her time, her talents, and service. It is inspiring how she has taken the skills and abilities she has been given and helps others with it. Whether it be teaching music for Vacation Bible School kids or cooking meals for sick neighbors, she offers what she can.

10. How to love
If my mother does anything, she loves. She raised three children who all grew up knowing that they were loved. Never did we have to question if our parents loved us. It was known. It IS known. She loves her parents, and my father’s parents. She loves her siblings, her in-laws, she loves her students, and she loves all those who surround her. In the same way, she loves my father and is a perfect example of how to foster a relationship and keep it healthy. When I had my heart broken in a million pieces, she said, “I only hope this doesn’t affect your ability to love.” She knew that to truly love another (and to have them love you in the same way) was something incredibly special and she didn’t want me to miss out on that experience.


My mother has taught me a lot of things, but in her mind, there are no categories. There are no “Top 10 Lists”. She taught me all of these things because she wanted me to be a beautiful person, inside and out. She knew my entire life that I could do amazing things and she wanted me to believe it too. So, thank you, Mom; for everything you’ve taught me – and for what you continue to teach me every single day!

"I actually digested a huge gust of wind on my way to work.."

I am seriously in love with this video. Can't.Stop.Laughing!

Boyfriend Diaries: A Family Affair

Since I'm no longer dating, the Dating Virginia section of the blog is no more. Instead, I figured it's time to debut a "sequel" (if you will) to that section, Boyfriend Diaries. It will be relatively similar, but only one boy will be discussed ;) I, of course, wont be going into much detail about our lives, because the relationship we have and what we share is private and I would never want to say or do anything to lose Craig's trust. However, I feel that there are some things that are okay to share and I'll be doing that in this blog section.

Let's go.

First, can I take an "aside" and talk about how weird/awesome it is that I have a boyfriend? It's a word that I haven't used to describe someone in almost 4 years. In fact, when he first used the term (he said it first, not me - I didn't want to rush in and label something that wasn't 'there' yet.) it struck me as odd. Boyfriend. Wow, I have a boyfriend. So strange and so exciting.

Anyway, back to the point. I've moved in. Not permanently, but, while by Upper East Side studio is being renovated, I've moved all of my things from my apartment in Murray Hill to a storage unit in Harlem while currently housing with Craig and his two siblings in their UES apartment. It's really not that big of a deal, since I've met them (and his parents) and have spent time with them in their space, but it is still their space. I'm on Day 2 and still feeling a little nervous about the living situation. I want to be a good "temporary house mate", keeping my things picked up, making very little noise, and contributing to the well-being of everyone in the home. I have a lot to prove here!

Not that I have a problem living with them for a little while, his brother and sister are great people who are very friendly and welcoming. But, I don't want to screw anything up.

Essentially, I've got a lot on the line. Family acceptance is vital to a healthy relationship and from past relationships, I understand how miserable it can be if the family doesn't like you. So, I have to prove that I can be respectful, kind, clean, fun, and sociable all while continuing to build a relationship with their brother. It's a lot to take in!

As usual, I'm probably over thinking the situation and I'm certain if the tables were turned, my family would act the exact same way, opening their arms to someone I care about and helping them in any way they could. In fact, thinking about it just now, I would be perfectly fine with my brother's girlfriend living with us for a week or so. Still, there's that tiny part of me that feels like I'm a burden. But, in order to get through this will everyone's spirit intact, I've got to push past those feelings and be myself. Well, a cleaner version of myself. ;)