2 dates last week - "The Law" is a 35 year old Tom Hanks look-alike. I'll set the picture for you: he started messaging me online, we exchanged numbers, talked on the phone a few times, and agreed to meet for tea one night. Cafe Lalo in the Upper West Side. Cafe Lalo just happens to be the place where You've Got Mail was filmed. I walked in (5 minutes fashionably late) saw him sitting at the back, he waved me over, greeted me at the table and we had tea.
Nice set-up, huh? He obviously knows and recognizes the Tom Hanks resemblance. Bringing me to Cafe Lalo to meet for the first time after communicating online. He's setting up a story! "I fell in love with my 'Tom Hanks' just like Meg Ryan in 'You've Got Mail'!"
He's an intellectual (owns a law firm) and his personality is one to match. He wasn't completely dull, but I wasn't falling over with laughter either. The date ended with a kiss on the cheek.
The next date that week was with a guy that I can't seem to come up with a nickname for. We met for drinks and really had a connection. We talked a lot, laughed, all in all, it was a really great first date. There was only one problem. Once we determined that we lived in the same neighborhood, we decided to share a cab uptown. During the cab ride, 'ol boy started gettin' fresh with me. Sure, I don't mind a kiss on the first date (if the date is going well), but I was a little shocked at his desire for a full-on makeout sesh in the cab.
For me, I can overlook a slight line overstepping in favor of a connection. To be honest, it was the best date I have been on in a long time. I'm seeing him again tomorrow. Just for naming sake, we've been calling him "Cab Guy".
This week, I met "The Law" again. After the first date jitters wears off, you can really get to know someone on a second date. It normally lasts a lot longer and it sometimes includes dinner. (The first dinner date is imperative to determine compatibility. You're forced to open yourself up to not being as proper as you could be with just tea. Seeing how people interact with their own food - and what type of food they choose eat - really can let you know what type of person you are with) Conversation was fine and we decided to get dessert after. Later, we were playing Scrabble (I was losing horribly) and then suddenly I was being pushed back on a couch. I stiff-armed him and told him that it was too far for me, but the damage had been done.
Men want sex. I get it. But I didn't realize that I give off a vibe of being easy. I won't be seeing "The Law" again.
We'll see how things go with "Cab Guy" tomorrow. But, I do know that I'm going to try and slow things down a bit. I felt a real connection with him and going too fast in the beginning will ruin everything.
How hard can it be to demand that a guy respect me? And, why can't I seem to give off that vibe?
Questions, questions, so many questions. And way too much testosterone.